Datuk Lost In Translation

Malaysians are all too familiar with Datuk Seri S. Samy Vellu's tongue twisting verbal back flips. Sometimes, the Public Works Department Minister's choice of words can leave even the most cunning linguists baffled. The following are some of Samy Vellu's humorous quotes:

1. Commenting on the speed and efficiency of Pos Laju's delivery system:
"Besok kirim, hari ini sampai!"

2. At a TV interview, when trying to say he was ashamed, he said:
"Kemaluan saya besar."

3. Samy Vellu once said in a speech:
"Kita akan bina satu jambatan untuk orang-orang kampong di sini."
One Pakcik asked, "Datuk, sini takde sungai, buat apa bina jambatan?"
and Samy gloriously replied, "Kalau takde sungai, kita bina sungai!"

4. Samy 's favorite quote on national television:
"Toll naik sikit, manyak marah saya. You ingat semua ini toll saya punya bapa punya kah!?"

5. During the water crisis:
"Semua orang diminta jangan membuang aiyerr."

6. Regarding social problems:
"..orang-orang muda sekarang banyak hisap dada.."

7. At a blood donation campaign in Sungei Siput:
"..marilah kita semua menderma dara.."

8. During the height of the Al-Arqam saga, he said in a press conference:
"Saya gembira bahawa didapati tiada pemuda MIC terlibat dalam kes Arqam."

9. At an opening ceremony:
"Tuan-tuan dan puan-puan, saudara mara, sesudah semua orang makan kenyang, sekarang kita mempersilakan Datin Paduka Rafidah Aziz naik ke pentas untuk membuka kain."

10. Commenting about his modesty:
"Sebenarnya, kemaluan saya sangat-sangat besar."

11. Pilihanraya:
"Orang PAS selalu kafir sama orang, saya pun dia kafirkan."

12. On the leak issue at the Parliament:
"Itu attap bocor sebab ada banyak sampah! Awak ingat saya kasi bawa naik itu sampahkah?"

I hope the Government isn't reading this. This was reposted from a Friendster bulletin. Please don't sue me Datuk. It's just a joke! :)